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Just when you thought that Maesters behind rocks didn’t exist, well, you would have been correct still. Because… it was a Septon.
Greetings from the one true kingdom of Game of Thrones fandom. A man goes by the name of Oz, and once again we are sincerely thankful you’ve decided to consort with us.
The jury is still out on how the entirety of Season 6 will be perceived by the masses as we have three more episodes left to absorb. But one thing is certain… it will be remembered as the season of memorable character returns. And The Broken Man fulfilled its duty in keeping up the trend.
Grab a bucket of chicken and let us discuss…
Right off the Bat
Ian McShane. Enough said.
But, no. This is Game of Thrones, where ambiguous deaths and assumptions get you in more trouble than defying the Many-Faced God.
And then there was a Hound, alive and well, and helping an unnamed group of people in construction. What the fuck’s a Lommy? And we haven’t even heard the damn theme song yet.
That Weird Talk with Your Pastor About Needing to Have Sex With Your Husband
Marg and the High Sparrow/sex advisor have a chat about the need for lying in the King’s bed. Marg seems to be playing this game beautifully and the Sparrow seems to be buying every bit of it.
But when the Sparrow brings up the Queen of Thorns and the need for her to follow Marg’s lead in order to avoid punishment, Marg springs to action and tells Grannie Flowers to go home.
Have I mentioned that I am done with the “good faith” crap with the Sparrow? If the intent of the writers is to build up a disdain for this guy, well, mission accomplished. Pryce sells it like a champ and has somehow made me look forward to his demise more than anyone else at this point. That’s a compliment.
And although I believe that the faith militant will be abolished, somehow the Sparrow will avoid death, maybe even by Margaery’s mercy (even though she is clearly playing it out).
Later on, Cersei would confront the QoT about their common issue and about her leaving KL, which ended up being a perfect time for Thorns to throw Cersei under the bus regarding her “stupidity.”
Regardless of if the faith militant is exterminated or not, and if there was ever any doubt about it, this scene pretty much sealed the fact that the Tyrells and the Lannisters’ relationship has gone far beyond the point of repair.
Finally, the return of Bronn occurs as Jaime and the Lannister army approach Riverrun. Jaime and company arrive in time to catch the Frey’s attempt at retaking the castle. After it fails miserably, Jaime informs Lothar that he is in charge with a gold hand backslap for Black Walder as a consolation.
Later, Jaime would parley with the Blackfish only to learn that he has no intention of leaving regardless of the consequences.
I’m not sure exactly how I expected this to play out. My hopes were that the Blackfish would reason with Jaime about everything that led to the current state of affairs and that the two would come to some sort of mutual agreement on how to move forward.
One of the outliers here is a reminder of how Jaime promised Catelyn to return Sansa and Arya in exchange for his freedom, which Blackfish directly inquires about. Maybe this comes into play with how the quest for Riverrun concludes. The other outlier is Brienne, who just so happens to show up in a scene with Jaime in the preview for next week.
Rallying the North
Jon and Sansa begin their mission of building an army with the Wildlings and making sure that they are on board. Unsurprisingly, Wun Wun’s opinion has a lot of pull.
Next on the tour was Lyanna Mormont of Bear Island, a little girl who is apparently done playing with Barbies. After Jon and Sansa speak to her to no avail, the only man that can sell ice to Wildlings steps up and seals the deal. Albeit, Davos secured a grand total of 62 men, but it was 62 more than what they had.
But the Glovers were having none of it and send the trio away empty handed. Jon tells Sansa that they are essentially out of time in attempting to garner more support.
Sansa then notices a raven and decides to send a note for help. I can only assume it is for Littlefinger and the knights of the Vale. I mean, you can’t have Lysakiller in only one episode in a season, can you?
Ain’t no Party Like a Greyjoy Party
The Greyjoy fleet stops off at an unnamed hooker and watering hole where Theon looks more uncomfortable than a slug at a salt convention.
Yara takes notice, licks a boob, and then tells Theon that if he does not come out of his current state that he may as well slit his wrists. Theon completes the Pyke version of the drinking game and agrees to come out of his stupor to help Yara.
This scene also puts to rest any speculation on where they are headed, which conveniently helps Dany with her “lack of ships” issue.
Yara then leaves to go lick the other boob.
Oddly not laying low in Braavos, Arya finds a Westorosi captain and makes an offer to secure transport home.
But shortly after the deal is made, Arya is approached by the Waif disguised as an elderly woman and is stabbed multiple times in the stomach (Talisa/Jon style). Arya falls into the water below the bridge and temporarily escapes.
I don’t know exactly how much blood you can lose from an abdominal injury before dying, but it is hard to imagine that Arya’s story comes to a close in the streets of Braavos after all we have seen her go through.
In fact, it would be a shock, which makes the scene even more of a head-scratcher. But hey, we’ve seen someone on death’s doorstep survive before, right?
You’ve got to hand it to George, or D&D, or whoever deserves credit, but making most of us viewers take the bait on the Hound likely being dead did a pretty decent job.
Regardless, Sandor Clegane is alive and has found himself in the service of a Septon named Ray. This Septon was apparently hiding behind the famous rock when the Hound had a bone sticking out of his leg following his battle with Brienne and nursed the wounded mutt back to health.
The Hound is encouraged by the Septon that his life holds meaning and that the Gods have a plan for him. Sandor states that he has done some bad things and questions why the Gods didn’t punish him, to which Ray answers that they already had.
While telling a story, the group is approached by riders who are most likely members of the Brotherhood Without Banners. Later, the Hound questions Ray about being warmhearted to the riders (reminiscent of a conversation the Hound had with Arya about decent actions that would get her killed).
Indeed, the group is later slaughtered and Ray is hanged.
This situation puts the Hound out on his own. More on this below.
Even worse, it means that we only got McShane for one episode. And that is a tragedy in itself.
Episode 607 Personal Awards
“I wonder if you’re the worst person I’ve ever met.” -Olenna
“You’ve lost Cersei. It’s the only joy I can find in all of this misery.” -Olenna
“That’s like saying I have a bigger cock than anyone in the Unsullied army.” -Bronn
“And a Lannister…” -Jaime “Don’t say it. Don’t fookin say it.” -Bronn
“Good thing we’re friends, or we’d be fucking you in the ass right now.” –Bronn
“If they’re half as ferocious as their lady, the Boltons are doomed.” -Davos
“Bargaining with oathbreakers is like building on quicksand.” -Blackfish
“Do you have two years, Kingslayer?” -Blackfish
“Nothing on the Iron Islands has an ass like that.” -Yara
“It’s never too late to come back.” –Ray
“I’m a fucking Septon. What was I supposed to say?” -Ray
Best Return Character: Without question, the Hound (with the Blackfish coming in a close second). Oh, and always Bronn.
Owning it like a Badass Award: The Young Lady Mormont, and Olenna’s conversation with Cersei.
Ow, That Shit Hurts Award: Arya getting stabbed (what’s the affinity with the abdomen?)
Jackass Award: Glover was up for the award, but his reasoning for not helping Jon and Sansa made perfect sense. So the award goes to whoever killed Septon Ray and his group (presumably the BWB).
Overall Thoughts: When a character returns from hiatus in a series, arguably the most important aspect is the timing of the event. In this case, the Hound returns and just so happens to be in the company of a religious man who saved him.
In the meantime, King’s Landing is under siege by the faith militant. Cersei is up for a trial by combat where her champion will undoubtedly be Frankenmountainstein. The Hound’s story emphasized that he was still alive for a reason and that the thing that kept him alive was hate. Is this setting up the greatest trial by combat ever?
And why would the Brotherhood kill a peaceful religious faction, even if they were hungry? Is this the same brotherhood that we witnessed in Season 3?
Overall, loved the episode. But as I said yesterday, I’m ready to get punched in the mouth again.
What say you? Chat it up, chicken lovers. And may there always be peace in your realm. –Oz
Find Oz on Twitter.
**SPOILER NOTE: The Management of this fine site would like to remind you that spoilers (book or leak) are not allowed in Unsullied posts. This includes spoilers that may be covered by code or otherwise. Personally, I appreciate feedback from Sullied and Unsullied alike, so long as they do not include any type of hinting or conversation related to the written verse. However, spoiler coded comments do tend to lead to further Sullied conversation and for that reason, we ask that you please refrain from posting any SPOILERY content whatsoever in Unsullied posts. Thank you for the coop. -Oz