Editorial/Humor/Recap

The Long Flight – Part 2

Posted on by Axechucker

Viserion 803 Season 8 The Long Night

ARGLBARGL!

We continue!!! Twitter Post Part Duh!

Get it or get gone!

(Part One)

…But first let’s check in on Harley.

Business as usual then!

I know you say that. I just…

I just don’t know if I b e l i e v e you.

MVP.

And then he WARGS…

Oh, and then, you know…

THE NIGHT KING ARRIVES.

lol mine too. Woulda bet MONEY he went to destroy Oldtown or KL.

Doesn’t matter. THE NIGHT KING WARGS…

…and dead dudes just start jumping.

I knew Wight Bob couldn’t resist the pretty fire forever. He just needed pops(icle) to give him a nudge.

Honestly he probably coulda just waited it out though. Fires don’t burn forever. You’d assume a dead guy would have more patience.

A little, certainly. Dead climbing like cockroaches though…

Westerosi War Z.

The Hound was freaking out!

ARYA was doin’ her thing though!

Excuse you, but a certain UNDEAD GIANT has something to say about that!

Nu.

It gets bette—uh, worse. It gets worse.

Davos is always underrated. Consistently excellent.

Meanwhile, over at Lyanna vs. the Giant…

Crunch.

I said the same thing!

I… don’t think she’ll be getting up from that one, pastor.

R.I.P. li’l girl.

Twitter gave her a LOT of love, though!

…No!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

#BANNED

I swear. Some people are SO immature.

So then the Nights King attempts to take Drogon in the rear…

(hehehe)

(Look, George says it, it’s perfectly acceptable.)

Jon -n- Dany are still flyin’, however!

Back to the regular ground-based fighti–

Oh, well, that was a very politely-phrased question. Thank you very much.

The answer is fucked. Ghost is fucked. He’s a rug somewhere!

JUST KIDDING.

We have no idea.

Meanwhile, the parapets are chaos.

Yes, good.

So Arya’s all bloody. Yikes. But take heart, she got away to the relative safety of…

The… library?

Arya using those rogue bonus actions!

Our girl is smoooooov.

Good advice. She runs.

MEANWHILE, IN THE CRYPTS…

I’m banning ALL of you for this blatant use of sarcasm!

#BANNED

Our Shireen lookalike Teela is there, Varys is looking nervous…

….and DYING PEOPLE ARE BANGING ON THE CRYPT DOOR.

Back topside, Beric and the Hound encounter Arya and 100 of her closest friends!

Newp.

Canon. Fire wight!

…..Make that a Former Fire Wight. R.I.P.

I’m gonna state with 99.8% certainty that Cersei will not save Arya.

That’s it.

That’s the rock I’m making my stand on.

Anywho. Melisandre joins Arya, Sandor, and the Artist Formerly Known As Beric Dondarrion’s Corpse.

How she got there, well, who can say?

Mmmmmaybe!

GURL YOU GOT TO. YOU RUN OUR WEBSITE.

So then somewhere over the Godswood…

DRAGONS BATTLING! BOOM!

The NIGHTS KING GETS KNOCKED OFF! Jon making his mark!

Rhaegal crashes!

Dany has the Night King in her sights, and shouts her favorite safe word!

…But we already kinda knew that wasn’t gonna play.

I mean.

I can’t argue that.

Jon–oh no. HO DON’T DO IT!

TOO LATE, MARLENE! N.K. RAISED EM UPPPPP!!!

ALL OF EM UPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!

Lyanna… Edd…. Dothraki dude…

Yeah, they’re all coming to the party.

Oh, say…

…I wonder if the crypts are still safe!

THE CRYPTS
ARE NOT
SAFE

Bruh.

I legit thought they were ’bout to wipe everyone in the crypts.

…and I was HERE for it.

I mean, look. Y’all know I stan the One True Queen Sansa Stark First of Her Name but

Imagine going through e v e r y t h i n g …

Episode ends, flush with the thrill of last-moment victory…

…Then our surviving heroes open the crypts as an epilogue:

EVERYONE DEAD.

An off-camera Red Wedding. What a gut-ripper.

….Fine, yeah, I’m #BANNED.

Yes it’s fine.

MEANWHILE, THEON’S STILL SHOOTIN’

AND IT’S NOT LOOKIN’ GOOD FOR OL’ JON. Those dead are all around him.

Luckily, our lad Aegon is saved by Dany!

But yo. DANY. PAY ATTENTION!

DROGON got SWARMED. That shit looked like he was crawling with a hundred ants.

Drogon flew off, shaking the bugs. But now Dany was in deep shite.

SER JORAH TO THE RESCUE!

Jon is back in the courtyard. And the music is next level, y’all.

Bodies falling all around like rain.

MEANWHILE, in the GODSWOOD…

Yeah, Theon Greyjoy could use some help here.

MEANWHILE
THE CRYPTS
ARE STILL NOT COOL.

SANSA and TYRION are lookin’ like… well, this is it.

Back outside.

Everyone….

Is….

Fucked.

Priorities.

THEY COMIN’ FOR BRAN.

But THEON is taking down ALL the wights.

Bran’s back… from… wherever he went.

But all he’s really able to do is drop some words on our boy Theon.

“Theon. You’re a good man. Thank you.”

What is Dead May Never Die.

um yes!

A lot of us were baelingVvv.

But no moreso than Harley… probably…

But her twitter feed had gone D E A D.

(I’m’a be honest, I was a little worried for the lass.)

And THEN—

There it is. Our girl!

Meanwhile…

JORAH is being HELLA STABBED!

CHAOS REIGNS.

ALL IS LOST!

The Night King has a stare-down with Bran…

Oh, he has one.

Funny you should request that.

She did call it.

THE UNDEAD CRUMBLE LIKE GoT-THEMED OREO COOKIES.

And she’s home.

The Nuth Remembuhs.

So Jorah gets a nice death solilo—-oh. Guess not.

lol ouch.

Melisandre… well, she’s had enough of this life.

Bye.

looooooooooooooool

And hey, all the NAMED characters survived the crypts! Even wee Teela.

Still legally married!

(I think?)

(Ramsay’s marriage didn’t really count if the first one was never actually annulled.)

I mean, that’s different from most men’s “one track mind.”

I’m down!

I just don’t have that answer.

And then… it was over.

HAY. SPOILERS. I can’t see Endgame ’til Thursday!

Everyone. Literally everyone.

(But to her point, she predicted it like two years ago, so hey!)

Next Week on Game of Thrones…

Seems so!

But we’re gonna continue this conversation in our record-breaking THIRD (3rd) Twitter post.
In a, uh, day or so. I need to go to bed.

BUT BY ALL MEANS @ ME, THERE WERE SOME REAL INTERESTING CONVERSATIONS HAPPENING.

Wouldn’t miss ’em for the world.

, , ,
Axechucker
Axey writes.

9 Comments

  1. Axey, I’m so going to miss these and you. Yeah, I’ll miss everybody from WotW, but you with this brilliantly concocted cleverness gleaned from the far reaches of Twitterland brighten my day no end. I wondered how you were going to make anything funny from the excruciating tension and heartache of this episode, but you did! Thanks for your work on these and making my Wednesdays happier.

    For the record, Jorah’s last words were “I’m hurt.” Heartrending, all things considered.

  2. Thank you for compiling this ridiculously large amount of tweets, oh Axechucking one <3

  3. May I just say how much I appreciate you are doing these compilations? We only get to see the eps a day later than you, but even if that wasn’t the case, there is no way I would go on twitter during screening, too distracting.
    So, thank you!

  4. Great recap as always. Just missing one thing… MY tweet! LoL. So here it is just for fun. This was posted before the ep began:

    Miss Nikki (@MissNikkiDotCom) tweeted at 7:11 p.m. on Sun., Apr. 28, 2019:

    @Axechucker the 1st one I grabbed was a direwolf. Is that a sign from the old gods? #GamefThrones #GameofThronesSeason8
    https://t.co/GQGwEoVacw
    (https://twitter.com/MissNikkiDotCom/status/1122684731517100033?s=09)

    (It was a direwolf oreo. So in fact yes, it WAS a sign and I’m sooo pleased. Arya is amazing.)

  5. Yep, we are enjoying every minute of this!

    Re-enjoying a great episode from another angle….

  6. Oh, I am with you on the crypts, Axey. Heroes opening them after the fight to find all dead would be heart wrenching.

    Thanks for another twitter recap.

  8. Wow, what an amount of work went into collecting all of these comments, they and your commentary were a lot of fun to read! Thanks!

  9. Axey, you and this fandom are
    So. Damn. Funny!
    I laugh out loud every time. I will sorely miss this monumental compilation of yours. A fantastic achievement, Ser! 💖

Comments are closed.