How ’bout them zombies? This week seems to be a universally praised episode, so let’s see how the reviewers in our videos dealt with the events of Hardhome.
Ozzy Man does his best work when he’s excited about the adventures of Jonno Snow, so this week’s is pretty ace.
You KNOW Jonathan of Gay of Thrones has ALL kinds of things to say about those White Walkers.
Our most excellent friends at HappyCool. This time it’s not solely Sandrine reacting to something and Kenny going “yup” and nodding. Reactions abound like a poorly staffed high school chemistry lab on a substitute teacher day.
Not going to lie, I was most excited to see What the Flick for the amount of Turkish cursing as Cenk recounts his experience watching. Ana is here this week for a fully TYT group!
More videos:
History of Westeros and their two vids: Sullied book to show and Unsullied-ish show-only discussion
An *UNSULLIED* review by schmoes Kristian Harloff and Mark Ellis.
Sawyer7mage – Solo review unless you count the Funko dolls
Think Hero – Partially Sullied? Don’t quote me.
The youthful panel at Afterbuzz
Thank you for reading, thank you for commenting, thank you for your additional links, and I got Grantland this week!
Which reviews had the best takes on Hardhome? Which are the best in general for reviewing the shockers? Please share and have a great weekend!
It’s great that Ozzy Man loves the show again…. 😀
Looks like the soundtrack for Season 5 will indeed be out next Tuesday:
http://filmmusicreporter.com/2015/06/02/game-of-thrones-season-5-soundtrack-details/
1. Main Titles
2. Blood of the Dragon
3. House of Black and White
4. Jaws of the Viper
5. Hardhome, Pt. 1
6. Hardhome, Pt. 2
7. Mother’s Mercy
8. Kill the Boy
9. Dance of the Dragons
10. Kneel for No Man
11. High Sparrow
12. Before the Old Gods
13. Atonement
14. I Dreamt I Was Old
15. The Wars to Come
16. Forgive Me
17. Son of the Harpy
18. Throne for the Game
He’s the most overrated thing in the entire community.
Ozzy Man has quickly become one of my favourite reviewers.
Andrew,
Interesting how many of those we haven’t actually heard despite the titles being familiar. I think “The Wars to Come” sound clip sounds eerily like something that could be used during
There are tones of Melisandre’s theme in there. Then again given the title it could just be part of the track that was used for Mance’s death, but it really doesn’t seem like it to me.
Remaining Grantland links are here. You can also click on the link for Part 1 Bex provided and select the “Up Next” video in the right-side queue.
Part 2 (Chris Ryan and Mallory Rubin) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKQHxtFedRA
Part 3 (Andy Greenwald and Jason Concepcion) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79tdtzCtBIs
Good stuff this week. Everyone’s happy!
Ozzy Man again with the win.
I love the guy. He’s brilliant and always honest in his videos/reviews. He says what he thinks, not always just what people want to hear. And even though he has read the books, he doesn’t do spoilerly predictions like other reviewers.
That’s why OzzyMan is the only dude I trust to watch his reviews in front of my unsullied family members. Others I watch myself alone.
I often find reaction videos more entertaining to watch (the ones with commenting rather than just angry shouting etc..), and Blind Wave is one channel that I am always watching.
(I always watch What the Flick?!, though)
Mark,
I’m curious how the final track “Throne for the Game” will be used: a very mournful reworking of the main theme using a male soloist. Almost the complete inverse of “The Children” track last year. Very intriguing!
Gerard Depardieu made me howl.
Andrew,
Given that “Throne for the Game” is the last track on the album and contains strong elements of the main theme, I’m wondering if it could end up being another “For the Realm” from Season 3 – a track that’s included on the soundtrack but doesn’t actually feature within the narrative confines of the show itself. If we get the full soundtrack next week and that song is only around a minute and thirty seconds, that’s probably what it is. I certainly hope it will be included in the show, however, because it sounds amazing.
Other standout tracks for me include “Blood of the Dragon”, “Hardhome, Part 1”, “Hardhome, Part 2”, “Kneel for No Man”, and “Before the Old Gods”. But every track on this album sounds great! Ramin Djawdi can do no wrong.
My only minor disappointment, if you can even call it that, is that I was hoping the soundtrack would include a complete version of “The Dornishman’s Wife” as sung by Jerome Flynn. Oh well.
Andrew,
Here is my latest contribution to the alternative soundtrack:
The night’s king’s version of “Don’t stop me now” (Hey someone had to give the guy lyrics)
If anyone’s interested in my previous contributions:
* Flayin’ Alive (by Ramsay/Reek) http://watchersonthewall.com/the-cast-of-game-of-thrones-goes-musical-for-red-nose-day/
* Crazy in Love (Sam/Gill-Y) http://watchersonthewall.com/goo280/#comment-344298
“Don’t Stop Me Now” (Night’s King)
Tonight I’m gonna have myself a real good time
I feel alive and up North some folks are gonna die Yeah!
I’m gonna cause a massacre
So don’t stop me now. Don’t stop me
And give me some good lines, give me more screentime
I’m a scary dude all wrapped up in mist
A white walker, defying the laws of life & death
I cause gruesome deaths, but hey I don’t rape, I get raving reviews!
Viewers go up up up,
It’s a guarantee!
I’ll chill you with blue eyes yeah!
Two hundred degrees
You’ll freeze like below Fahrenheit
I’m turning you into a wight
I wanna make a superscary one out of you
Don’t stop me now
No matter crow or free folk
I’m crushing your head
Don’t stop me now
Yes you’re gonna have a good time
You’ll rise from the dead
Don’t stop me now (I’m having a good time)
Don’t stop me now (having a good time)
I don’t want to stop at all… yeah!
I’m a white walker on my way down south
On a collision course
With all of Westeros, and I’m in control
I’ll tear down the Wall, leaving none alive
Look how few made it out of
Ho oh oh oh oh Hardhome
I’ll get you cold blue eyes yeah!
You’ll jump down some cliffs
Balls freezing below Fahrenheit
You’re joining the King of the Night
I’m gonna make a killer skeleton out of you
Don’t stop me
Don’t stop me
Don’t stop me
Hey hey hey!
Don’t stop me
Don’t stop me
Ooh ooh ooh (I like it)
Don’t stop me
Don’t stop me
Give me screentime, screentime
Don’t stop me
Don’t stop me
Ooh ooh alright
Nooo, touching Dragonglass
Nor Valyrian steel
No shattering like Dany’s wheel
I’m craving for a dragon kill
I wanna freeze the iron throne in the end
Don’t stop me now
If you wanna ride a dead horse
Come join me my friend
Don’t stop me now
These suckers in King’s landing
Will believe in the end
Don’t stop me now (Cause I’m having a good time)
Don’t stop me now (Yes I’m having a good time)
I don’t wanna stop at all
La la la la laaaa
La la la la
La la laa laa laa laaa
La la laa la la la la la laaa hey!!….
Jared,
the blood of the dragon and hardhome and forgive me and kill the boy are my favorites
Ozzy man, don’t pay attention to any toads here, you are great and I am thrilled for your return to the love!!
Axey….I don’t have a question so much as a small comment. Sandrine’s voice drops out about half the time….when she starts talking she is clear and louder and a few words into a sentence she drops to more of a lower volume and you can’t understand her unless you can lip read. That said, I really do adore the two of you together, very good chemistry.
If I had a question it would be about Valerian swords. We know the one that Jon has is the real deal. We know that Ice (Eddards sword) was the real deal. I have read that the reason that Valerian swords are effective is because they are forged with dragon fire. 1. How was Tywin able to have Ice smelted, he didn’t have dragon fire. 2. How were the two new swords for Jamie (now Brienne) and Joff (now who knows where it is) reformed with no dragon fire? Would it be sort of like Multiplicity? The second clones are not as effective as the original???? Maybe they wouldn’t be able to kill the WW’s??? This has been bugging me for a while actually, but until Sundays episode it didn’t become too pertinent, now it is pretty freakin’ pertinent!! Any thoughts on that?? Thanks ahead of time.
Right? That and Angry Cher and Christina Agulara….sometimes it is hard to hear Jonathan, but he has alternate names for all the regulars on GoT’s. Love Gay of Thrones!!
Ozzy Man, not only do I enjoy your thought-out criticisms and hilarious turns of phrase about your fackin’ stiffy, I’ve gotta say your taste in music is brilliant.
What the Flick! were disappointing this week. I get the impression Ana has barely seen the show and the Walking Dead references are just the laziest. John Iadarola seems to mix up book and show lore and Ben still can’t remember the names of characters he’s been watching for half a decade now. Ay….
Same here…first reaction videos are more entertaining to watch than people fumbling around trying to dissect what they saw. To me, the latter simply isn’t interesting.
I’ve tried to watch What the Flick?! several times and always cut it off a few minutes in because I’m rolling my eyes too much. They get so much wrong and take too long talking about it to keep my interest.
Get this ozzy dude to host the thronecast next season sky Atlantic fuck Mel and Sue. It doesn’t even bother me that he is Australian lol
Watched and loved The The Flick review on Monday. That’s one of the first reviews I look forward to on Mondays. Also, good to see the old gang back together, Ana included.
Rat Kook,
Fantastic to hear you enjoy my criticisms and stiffy! I take music very seriously. I tried about 3 different songs this week before settling on Paul Dempsey’s cover of wrecking ball in the final edit. Ripper of a cover!
Moles town bastard,
I’d do that in a bloody heartbeat! Put me alongside Mel and Sue. I’ll stir some shit.
Mustafa. S.,
Thanks heaps for reviewing me Mustafa 🙂 I agree it’s so ridiculous to watch reviewers that are book wankers or spend copious amounts of time in spoiler communities that act like they’re making predictions. It’s kinda like, “righto, get your hand off it buddy.” I guess us critics all wanna sound like smart authoritarians. Bahhh. I’m content with sounding dumb and emotional.
Valaquen,
I think people watch it for Cenk. Matt Aduralde is usually solid on reviews but the other TYT guys do a lot better when they stick to news stories and commentary.
Ozzy’s chuckle when describing Ramsay’s adhoc attack plan with “20 good men” had me rolling. 🙂
I agree it’s hard for Dorne to compete with a budget of $10.
Yes, it is the Stark story and it is good to have fantasy back.
“Deliver a gobby to Jon, asap!”
END, with a massive stiffy. Thx again, Ozzy!
On to my next watch of ep8 over lunch!
Valaquen,
The What the Flick crew expressed greater enthusiasm in the past and seemed a little disengaged. Ana just wasn’t into it at all (was she ever?). Ben is seen-it-all Hollywood royalty who won’t be impressed (or terribly interested) in much of anything beyond a certain professional point. Book reader John never says too much because *** spoilers ***.
Which leaves Cenk. I always love how his brain explodes with gobsmacked epiphanies, even when–particularly when!–he’s dead, dead, dead wrong.
But the old juice was missing, as if the crew found it hard to recalibrate after the ‘over it’ mode of the last few weeks.
Valaquen,
I find Ben’s horribel memory kind of endearing. And that’s a good perspective to get in video reviews- Unsullied, but thoughtful. Critical.sometimes, but not a hater.
I agree though that this was my least favorite of their videos. Jon saying there are only six or so White Walkers? He is sometimes a horrible expert. And Cenk was annoying this week. Criticizing people for being amazed at that lost shot, and he was way too proud of himself for that “brilliant” question he would have asked the stern Septa. He’s getting into this habit of saying what HE would do if he were those characters, and a lot of his ideas are awful…
Hodor’s Bastard,
Nice! Enjoy your lunch and Jonno Snow action. I reckon I’ll be doing my rewatch on the weekend.
Ozzy Man won me back with this video. I was finding him a bit negative before but I thought “he must have liked this one though!” Glad I watched. I still find his dislike for the KL storyline irrational, and his criticisms of Sansa’s scenes are just getting lazy. Hope his perspective changes in the next couple weeks.
I found this reaction video below. I posted not because it’s great but it reminds me of why I watch GoT. The book vs show war has been so toxic this past year. It’s grown worse this season. I bet these bros don’t care about any of that and it just reminds me that I should watch because if fun and stop watching if it’s not fun. I need to just enjoy the show for what it is and just ignore the toxic flame wars.
JCDavis,
My hazy recollection is that Tywin imported a lost-arts expert from Essos to do the reforging. There might have been a hint that some kind of ancient magic was involved.
(Book wonks feel free to correct me please!).
I don’t know that the show will address any such issues with the swords, but I do like your idea that full Valyrian would be, say, a .44 Magnum, diluted Valyrian a .38, and regular old castle-forged steel a child’s toy (apologies to Needle!).
I wouldn’t mind seeing Dany’s dragons used as large bellows to forge new swords, with a shirtless (and sweating, ladies, sweating!) Gendry pounding out their final form in a rush order.
Or: just have Wun Wun give the Walkers a bear hug; the worst he’d get is some frostbite.
Ace of Mace,
Group viewing is fine, but I prefer to do my watching as I do my drinking: alone and in the dark, as God intended.
I think people are too wrapped up in the portrayal of the sparrows to realize that the heart of the Kings Landing storyline is about a paranoid Queen Mother, loosing her power, and grasping for whatever straws she can find. She carelessly unleashes a new power on the city, a power she thought she could control, but in the end couldn’t… Her bad decision making catches up to her, and shes forced to pay the consequences for all her actions up until this point…
Yea, with more screen time, the show could’ve given the sparrows depth, given the faith militant more context, but they are focusing on the big picture, and telling the story as it relates to the arcs of the main characters.
FreyJoy,
Once again thank you for your songs! 😀 You’ve already cured my fear of Ramsay as now I just imagine him singing Flaying Alive and practicing his dance moves when he appears.
But this is even more awesome to me as I am unfortunately 100% incapable of finding anything remotely zombie-like even a tiny bit scary, due I think to my first experience of them being Michael Jackson’s Thriller video. I was totally psyched up and involved in the scene until the wights appeared, then my suspension of disbelief was smashed into a billion pieces like Valaryan steel through a white walker 🙁 The scene ended with the cats and I doing the Thriller dance together on the settee and when the Night’s King raised up his new recruits, for a split second I though they were all going to do syncronised zombie dancing too. And now I can watch it again, imagine him singing that to himself and know that if we’d been able to hear his inner monologue I was actually thinking along the right lines after all! 😉
Lulu’s Mum,
Giant Killer Penguins doing a Happy Feet dance…?
Or perhaps the Walker King singing ‘Beat It’ with the lyrics ‘Freeze it… Freeze it…’?
Rodrik the Reader,
YUS! Liking your thinking there. We had some GoT-themed REM songs about a week ago and there was a phase over the summer of using Simon and Garfunkel lyrics in posts. Personally I need some back up tunes for ep 9 because I think it’s crunch time for whether or not Shireen gets sacrificed, which is one of the few things I think I really couldn’t watch. Don’t want to think about that outcome so I’m making myself a happy playlist instead. Massive yay for her and anyone who saves her (my money’s on Dad and/or Davos) and damn you to hell for even considering the idea for Selyse and Mel (and Dad if he goes there). I’m 47 so not really good on the sort of stuff that’s in the charts now, but anything 70s and 80s is ideal. Gonna have to think about it and I’ll let you know my least worst suggestions; all ideas welcome. Hmmmm….not a song but….giant killer penguins delayed until ep 9 and do a Wun Wun wight-stomp-type-dance on Selyse and Mel. “Oh sorry ladies I seem to have crushed you horribly to death, my bad.” I feel better already! 🙂
Lulu’s Mum,
Something korny on Mel is a great suggestion. Will keep it in mind!
Does anyone know who does the version of Wrecking Ball on Ozzie Man’s video? It’s a damn fine tune.
FOR: LULU’S MUM above (forgot to hit the reply button)–
Total cultural immersion should be our goal!
GoT marching bands and prom themes, of course.
And on TV:
‘White Walker, Texas Ranger.’ ‘America’s Next Top Other.’ ‘Dancing with the Starks.’ ‘Greyjoy’s Anatomy.’ CIS: King’s Landing.’ ‘Bolton Abbey.’ ‘Desperate Spearwives.’ ‘The Manderley Hillbillies.’ ‘Melisandre the Teenage Witch.’ ‘The King of Queens.’ ‘Keeping Up with the Sand Snakes.’ ‘Starks and Recreation.’ ‘The Prince is Right.’ ‘How I Met Your Mother.’ ‘Devious Maidens.’ ‘Switched at Birth.’ ‘Burn Notice.’
(Some of the above are actual titles.)
I really want to hate that gay of thrones thing every week as soon as I hit the play button.. but then I don’t hate it. <:c
Never mind, I see its Paul Dempsey. Still a great cover…
Ha, I do love the “Gay of Thrones” recaps…
“Scary Gandalf” LOL! 😀
Rodrik the Reader,
That’s hilarious!
I can’t stand the dude. He loves to hear himself talking. He’s a real narcist.
I prefer the Afterbuzz reviews. Some smart ladies over there.
FreyJoy,
Love your creativity. Now get crackin’ on those ‘Calidornication’ lyrics.
An Unsullied (at least I think she is) recapper I highly recommend is: shameldotcom on youtube. I think she does a great job of summarising the action/story and giving her own personal take on things. She doesn’t always know where things are heading and so her speculations can often be pretty entertaining. She has (imo) a charming British sensibility to it all which is quite refreshing. I personally get a bit tired of the ‘pretend airhead’ way of talking some vloggers seem to use these days.
Her vids are usually about 20-30 mins long.
Here’s her Hardhome recap:
Edited to add: oop I didn’t mean to embed it, is that okay? How do I change to a link?
Lulu’s Mum,
For your episode 9 party:
My Shireena
(‘My Sharona’ by The Knack)
Tie a Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Weirwood Tree
(Tony Orlando)
Rodrik the Reader,
You Ser/Lady are a genius. I’d only managed to get as far as D&D covering To cut a long story short (Spandau Ballet) and Jon Snow doing Duran Duran’s Is there something I should know? Going to have to up my game now. *sings* Da da da da da da my Shireena Love it! 😀
Lulu’s Mum,
Ser Rodrick The Reader was recently knighted, so most definitely a male type.
That is all for now except that the clock at the top of my screen says 3 days and 2 hours….Can I start to find my happy place now??
Ser RtReader, I will reply to your response about swords tomorrow. But just so’s ya know, it makes sense.
How have I lived this long without Ozzy’s reviews? I laughed until I cried and now I think I am going to watch it again.
Jared,
I really like the Watch the Thrones podcast, because its a mixture of geeky Westeros facts (from Mallory and Jason) and bro humor (from Andy and especially Chris). I like that they don’t take it so seriously. But Andy baffles (and frustrates) me sometimes: His comments are often inconsistent, and I have no idea why someone who has an issue with bleakness and violence watches this show.
Lulu’s Mum,
Everybody hold hands, sway, and sing:
We all kill the Harpies of Meereen, Harpies of Meereen, Harpies of Meereen.
Staying with the Beatles, if you’re familiar with Blackbird, this one’s for Bran:
Black-raven warging in the dead of night,
Take these broken legs and learn to fly.
Since your fall,
You were only dreaming that this moment would arise.
Black-raven warging in the dead of night,
Take these three eyes and learn to see.
All your life,
You were only waiting for this moment to be free.
Dale Rippke,
Spot on. Paul Dempsey doing the wrecking ball cover. He has a whole acoustic album called Shotgun Karaoke. You’ll find a bunch of songs on YouTube or the whole thing on Spotify.
And let’s pretend that Wun-Wun magically learns English so he can sing:
I am he, as you are he, as you are me,
And we are all not the Others.
See how they run like zombies in the sun, see how they fly.
I’m dying.
Sitting on dragonglass, waiting for my ship to come.
Look like Liam Neeson, that may be the reason
I wanna tear some naughty toys; Grind them in the ground now.
I am the megaman, they are the eggmen
I am the penguin, goo goo g’ joob.
Lulu’s Mum,
Well, then, let’s get the party started. And perhaps we can enlist the considerable talents of Freyjoy and Ginevra on the classic hits below:
Valyrian Woman
American Woman / The Guess Who
Daenerys – Let the Dragons In
Aquarius – Let the Sunshine In / The Fifth Dimension
Hey Jon
Hey Jude / The Beatles
You Can’t Hurry George
You Can’t Hurry Love / The Supremes
Hello, Cersei!
Hello, Dolly! / Louis Armstrong
Jaime’s Girl
Jesse’s Girl / Rick Springfield
Lady (as an ode to Sansa’s direwolf)
Kenny Rogers
Craven of the County (Sam)
Coward of the County / Kenny Rogers
I’m Coming Out (Loras)
Diana Ross
Hot Stuff (Mel)
Donna Summer
It’s a Hardhome
It’s a Heartache / Bonnie Tyler
We Are the Night’s Watch
We Are the Champions / Queen
Short People (apologies to Tyrion)
Andy Newman
You Light Up My Life (Selyse, Mel)
Debby Boone
Dragon Queen (was this one already done?)
Dancing Queen / Abba
Thank God I’m a Wildling Boy
Thank God I’m a Country Boy / John Denver
The Conqueror (Aegon)
The Wanderer/ Dion
Hardhome Hotel
Heartbreak Hotel / Elvis Presley
The Westeros Wind
The Wayward Wind / Gogi Grant
(I Can’t Get No) Resurrection
(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction / The Rolling Stones
To Ser with Love
To Sir with Love / Lulu
I Wanna Steal Your Hand
I Wanna Hold Your Hand / The Beatles
Last Ship from Hardhome
Last Train to Clarkesville / The Monkees
… and the obvious (drumroll)…
Hound Dog (Sandor!)
Elvis Presley
Rodrik the Reader,
What eclectic tastes you have. I’m from Clarksville, so that penultimate one hits close to home.
Ginevra,
Rodrik the Reader,
Awesome stuff 😉
FreyJoy, Ginevra, Rodrik the Reader,
You three are all kinds of awesome, you should combine your considerable talents with the guy who writes GoT‘s music for win-win (Wun Wun?) karaoke greatness 😀 I will be relying on you all for funny distraction in case the small lovely person/big scary fire thing happens next ep (that’s Shireen btw, not Dany, she’s proved she can look after herself) 🙁
Excellent!! 😀 Beatles fan through and through here. Very well done.
*tosses hat in the ring*
I’ll have a go at it as well, thanks Ser RtReader for the title:
You Can’t Hurry George (Parody of You Can’t Hurry Love by the Supremes)
We need George, George
To ease our mind
We need to find, find a book to call all mine…
But remember Georgie said…
You can’t hurry George
No, you just have to wait
Writing don’t come easy
It’s a game of punt and fake
You can’t hurry George
No, you just have to wait
You’ve got to trust and give me time
No matter how long I take
But how many heartaches must we stand
Before we get the books to let us live again
Right now the only thing that keeps us hangin’ on
Is HBO when our strength is gone and
Remember Georgie said……
You can’t hurry George
No, you just have to wait
Writing don’t come easy
It’s a game of punt and fake
You can’t hurry George
No, you just have to wait
You’ve got to trust and give me time
No matter how long I take
Now we can’t bear to wait and moan
We grow impatient for a book to call our own
But when we feel that we just can’t go on
These harsh words he has will keep us hanging on
We remember Georgie said…..
You can’t hurry George
No, you just have to wait
Writing don’t come easy
It’s a game of punt and fake
You can’t hurry George
No, you just have to wait
You’ve got to trust and give me time
No matter how long I takes
NOW FAKE……….
I think that is about enough of that hot mess. Don’t worry I will show myself to the door. *slow creak and soft click of the lock*
JCDavis,
That’s what I’m talkin’ about! Somebody somewhere please make this happen. Perhaps HBO could get Beyoncé? Think of the cross-marketing potential!
Marvelous work, JC. As the QoT would say, ‘Absolutely singular.’
Rodrik the Reader,
*preens*
LOL it is fun to do parodies…. thanks for the praise. Sometimes I will see something and I know the song well so it sparks the imagination.
And….the ticker shows 2 days 5 hours!! Maybe I will just drink enough tonight to sleep until then. 😉 😛