Editorial/Humor/Recap

The Final Tweetdown – Part 1

Posted on by Axechucker

(5) Helen Sloan - HBO

THIS IS THE LAST EPISODE AND THEREFORE THE LAST TWITTER POST! (Part 1)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (Part 1 of aaaaaa)

@Axechucker and @WatchersOTWall! If you don’t get it by now, you never will.

….Go!

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Indeed. But before we can go into this ep, people were still talkin’ shit ’bout LAST week…

Weird AND harsh.

People also talkin’ ’bout Ye Olde Days…

All truth.

There were a number of tweeted acknowledgements from more than a few people affiliated with the show:

PILOU.

lol yep.

So preparations for the finale were made, and the fandom was showing OUT…

Bonus: Check our gal Vanessa’s sweet new Emilia-inspired tattoo:

Some hopes, fears, and predictions were made:

Jessica Chastain was MORE THAN A LITTLE DEMANDING with regard to her predictions:

Someone’s been reading internet spoilers and regrets it!

lol

The minutes were tickin’ down… and yo, people were SWEATING…

Tough tittays!

With no delay… it began!

NO TA-TAS TODAY!

Previously on Gee Oh Tea…

That is all.

So let’s hit that sweet GAME of THRONES INTRO one last frickin’ time!

THE FINAL TWERKDOWN!

It kind of was? Maybe not at first glance. Time to get those spectacles, pastor!

Lena probably all, “Easiest mil I ever made, really.”

We opened… on Tyrion Lannister!

He drinks, knows things, and routinely meanders through post-apocalyptic devastation.

sygx

Everything was wasted, but no one was tasted.

Djawadi wins even when he doesn’t Djawadi.

Jon and Davos walked behind Tyrion, clearly enjoying this tour as much as he…

Right? The first thing I thought was “George would fucking LOVE this part.”

Tyrion headed toward the Red Keep, whilst Jon and Davos encountered Grey Worm…. who is NOT playing around.

“Kill all who follow Cersei Lannister.”

Mayhaps not! Because Jon left.

Grey Worm executed. SLICE!

Meanwhile, Tyrion entered the Red Keep, which was surprisingly not 100% demolished.

He then went down below…

My day job as a Dungeon Master also demanded this question be answered! Does Tyrion walk around with a 2 lb. tinder box? What’s his STR score? Does this encumber him??

A golden hand.

You and me both.

I’m not supposed to #BAN you any more for horrific puns… but… the pain…

Ah, sod it.

#BANNED, WYN!!! #BANNED FOR LIFE HAHAHAHA LAST TWITTER POST WHAT NOW

‘CAUSE THEY’RE STARS, BABY!

Outside, Arya was back afoot…

Maybe she ate it? We saw Jon approaching the great stair…

Grey Worm waited at the top… and Daenerys Targaryen, First of Her Name, Mother of Dragons, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea (titles, titles) arrived on Drogon.

Bless you.

But yes! Dany had arrived… and for a moment she was a WINGED DRAGON.

So Dany gives a speech given to the Dothraki…

Dany then gave a speech in Valyrian to Grey Worm (the new Master of War) and her Unsullied!

“WILL YOU BREAK THE WHEEL WITH ME?”

Tyrion, Hand of the Queen, then approached Danaerys…

“I freed my brother, and you slaughtered a city.”

And then TYRION just up and QUIT.

Clink.

“Take him.”

And he’s taken away.

So then Jon finally encountered Arya…

Jon soon entered Tyrion’s makeshift cell…

“Oblivion is the best I could hope for.”

By the sound of it, he was hoping to!

“Love is the death of duty.”

“Sometimes, duty is the death of love.”

“And your sisters. Do you see them bending the knee?”

Jon left Tyrion.

The Targist Formerly Known as Jon Snow soon encountered Drogon, sleeping beneath the ash (and snow?)…

Our PoV shifted, and we were suddenly with Dany as she expectantly walked toward the throne.

I agree. Clarke has been brilliant this entire season.

WE NEEDED TEN EPISODES!

…Anyway.

Dany… touched the throne!

(But she never does sit.)

Jon entered.

Calling your shot, eh??

They KISSED…

And… Yeah.

He did that.

Who knows? Because uh.

…. Drogon arrived.

To Be Continued.

, , ,
Axechucker
Axey writes.

13 Comments

  2. Yeah, we were also wondering if Dany would cut herself on the iron throne before Jon walked in. Details, dudes, details!

    WinterRy71,

    Très cool.

  3. “None is as accursed as the Kinslayer!”

    Also wtf is with people saying this means Jon = AA?

    Did anyone see any bleeding stars? NUP.
    Was he reborn amidst salt and smoke? NAH (No hams were mentioned :p)
    Did he wake dragons from stone? TRIPLE NOPE
    Also it would imply that Jon’s tiny dagger is now lightbringer… which would actually be hilarious.

    I realize today that I didn’t like this because Jon’s choice was way, way too easy. Again. I was actually annoyed at him in the opposite direction for thinking even a second about staying “loyal” to Dany. Dany going full Anakin times 1000 ruined any sense of true tragic sacrifice this scene could have had… : (

  4. John Bradley is just such a sweet guy. 😀

    And Pilou damn that guy is funny, I think people love working with him.

    And Luka at the end.

    Great twitter feed 😀

  6. Thanks Axey, I love reading through these because I don’t have Twitter and it is a chance to experience the episode again through different eyes. There are some funny and insightful reactions. Some of the posts line up with my own thoughts as I watched, especially this one from Luka about the Tyrion and Jon discussion and the parallel to the one between Varys and Ned –

    This is the same argument Varys made to Ned before his execution. What about Sansa and Arya. Beautiful. #GameofThrones


    It was a moment in the episode that gave me chills!

    Looking forward to part 2, and maybe a part 3??

  7. Great ending!
    There is not enough misery in our lives. We should entertain some more. Maybe some people are too happy and some misery is necessary. I’ll definitely recommend this series and the future prequels to anyone happy. It will bring joy and wonder and doctor appointments.
    It is not for free! You must pay for it.

  8. Some FACTS of what happens after the ending:

    – GW and all the Unsullied die of butterfly fever (a disease native to the isle of Naath, google it). The symptoms are fever, painful spasms that make the victims seem to be dancing wildly and uncontrollably. In the last stage, those afflicted sweat blood, and their flesh sloughs from their bones. Natives are immune to it, but all other die.

    – Arya dies of thirst and starvation, lost at sea. But not before she has to cannibalize the corpses of her dead crew, in a futile attempt to prolong her existence while hoping to find land.

    – Drogon reproduces (dragons are hermaphrodites) and in a few years there’s a scourge of flying fire-breathing lizards desolating humanity.

    – Bronn borrows heavily from the Iron Bank and other houses, then disappears with all the money. Tyrion makes surprised pikachu face, again.

    – Sam has to renounce to his position amidst a scandal concerning his celibacy vows.

    – Bran tries to create a surveillance state, with his thousand eyes. But learns that he has no army, nor any house support after the first thing his sister does after his coronation is to proclaim independence.

    – All other 6 kingdoms claim independence. The riverlands are once again raped by everyone.

    – Gendry is thrown in the dungeons by the lords of Storm’s End, who won’t follow an allegedly Robert’s bastard, with only some legitimizing paper from the dead mad queen daughter of the mad king. He dies after eating rats.

    – The dothrakis go back to pillaging, raping and slaving. You know, traditional values.

    – Sansa is beheaded after the other realms invade the North, that has virtually no population to defend itself after the battle with the Night King.

    – John loses his penis to frostbite.

    – Ghost lives many years and has many puppies. Good boi.

  9. Iul,

    Come on, that was a very happy ending. Kinda should have been a lot more bitter, actually.

    Anyway, always a great recap. I am still amazed at that video of the guy falling not falling AKA Arya always surviving.

  11. ghost: – Arya dies of thirst and starvation, lost at sea. But not before she has to cannibalize the corpses of her dead crew, in a futile attempt to prolong her existence while hoping to find land.

    Actually, she found an alternate route to the Shadow Lands beyond Asshai, and even there, she was met by hordes of fans asking for an autograph from the woman who saved the world from the zombie apocalypse, so she faked her death, changed her face, and took on a new identity so she could wander in obscurity.

    Then she had to change her identity again after she used her Faceless Man poison skills to invent Roundup, and saved the world from the Ghost Grass Apocalypse.

  12. Best tweet post ever since I was included in it. LoL. I got my happy ending this season by being included in my very favorite Game of Thrones recap post!! Thanks Axey. Looking forward to part 2!!

  13. Thanks, Axey, for this tweet-storm round-up! You always do a fantastic job and I always enjoy this feature from WOTW.

    I really liked this line from you:

    “He drinks, knows things, and routinely meanders through post-apocalyptic devastation.”

    That belongs on a t-shirt with a pic of Tyrion meandering…

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