Hi, hey, hello! You don’t know what you thought of the new Game of Thrones episode? You need some critics to help piece your feelings together and form your thoughts into words? Well hold up, now! – Stop right there!! Have you checked out our own Sue’s recap for those devoted book readers past and present? How about the musings of our favorite Unsullied fellah Oz? Oh…you have? Well, why didn’t you say so! In that case, come on in and let us know what you think of your favorite and least favorite critics…respectfully, of course, and as always. While most of the critics are book readers and fewer are show-only watchers, it’s becoming less and less common for reviewers to even distinguish themselves at this point. If you are very concerned, make sure to check if the review has a *disclaimer* at the top.
Additionally, you might notice a few critics missing or substituted by other critics this week. This is due to many in attendance at Comic-Con this past weekend, presumably unable to watch GOT on time, understandably due to prior commitments. But anyway, without further adieu…
Aimeé Grant Cumberbatch The Evening Standard – In which, in a spoiler-free review, she enjoys the sense of catching up with the intricate web of GOT characters.
Alan Sepinwall, UPROXX – In which he is just as surprised as all of us to find that Euron is ‘boatloads’ of fun to watch – who’d have thought?
Alex Mullane, Digital Spy – In which he acknowledges the momentous occasion it is to have three eunuchs, a dwarf, and five women sitting around a map plotting, compared to earlier seasons, and calls this episode ‘Game of Thrones at its riveting best.’
Alyssa Rosenberg, The Washington Post – In which she analyzes what motivates people in times of crises and war, and the different ways various rulers or people in authority appeal to their followers, would be or otherwise.
Andrew Snell, Mirror – In which he highlights the uniqueness of Maester Qyburn’s badguy-ness, when compared to villains like Ramsay, Euron, or Joffrey.
Brandon Nowalk, The A.V. Club – In which he observes the smoothly flowing scenes, one into another, as though they finally represent one grand sequence at long last.
Dave Gonzales, Thrillist – In which he speculates on the futures of many of our characters who are now in near-perilous situations.
David Crow, Den of Geek – In which he thinks the ending sea battle was nothing special, lacked emotional resonance, and negatively compares it to Spartacus.
– [Edit from David Rosenblatt – Woah there, buddy, cool your jets. Spartacus is the greatest television show ever made and I will not take any jabs at it sitting down, so I’ll stand up for the rest of this writeup. End rant.]
David Malitz, The Washington Post – In which he compares the emotional resonance of Missandei’s and Grey Worm’s consummation compared to earlier scenes in what was once a ‘medieval porno.’
David Rosenblatt, SquintyOverAnalyzesThings – Me?! Well, I never! If you’re listening…come on in and see me struggle to find a theme, eventually settling on characters just trying to do what’s right.
James Hibberd, Entertainment Weekly – In which he suggests that the episode was so crammed with emotional climaxes and power plays that it’s surprising it’s episode 2 and not the finale.
Joanna Robinson, Vanity Fair – In which she asks 10 questions (one shy of last week – slacker!) and proceeds to do her damndest to answer them.
Kaitlyn Tiffany, The Verge – In which she analyzes in good detail the significance of GOT depicting consensual, romantic sex.
Kim Renfro – Business Insider – In which she connects many scenes from the episode with scenes from seasons’ past, among, of course, 800 other excellent articles.
Laura Hudson, WIRED – In which she reflects on the ‘be careful what you wish for’ mentality that befalls so many characters in this episode, or has befallen them previously that led them to this point.
Laura Stone, Hey Don’t Judge Me – In which she…I honestly don’t know how to summarize this one. You just need to read on for yourself – as a matter of fact it’s a requirement that you experience the greatness that is within.
Lauren Sarner, Inverse – In which she makes an astute Shakespeare reference, dubbing Olenna Tyrell the Iago of our tale.
Melanie McFarland, Salon – In which she thinks that the show continues to spend too much time frequenting loose ends and plots that aren’t central to the main story, but doesn’t mind when the loose end is a good one (Arya and Nymeria).
Michael Walsh, Nerdist – In which he dares to claim that the sea battle was ‘gorgeous’ and superior even than the Battle of the Blackwater…them some fighting words.
Mike Bloom, Salon – In which Westeros World News (™) grabs the latest headlines and puts them on a newstand for your reading pleasure. Obituaries come in pairs this week.
Myles McNutt, The A.V. Club – In which he reminds us that there are many secrets the audience knows about that the characters do not necessarily know.
Neil Miller, Film School Rejects – In which he compliments Arya’s slow return to a non-murder lifestyle (albeit one that will likely not last long).
Nina Shen Rastogi, Vulture – In which she believes that too many scenes and happenstances in the episode were too coincidental and unrealistically out of place. Prepare your pitchforks; we march at daybreak.
Rob Bricken, io9 – In which he understands that our characters, particularly Daenerys, need to go through rough times and experience difficulty if they are to ever achieve their goals, or even survive.
Sarah Hughes, The Guardian – In which she grins over GOT’s strength to subvert our expectations in scenes both small and big.
Sean T. Collins, Rolling Stone – In which he reminds us of the smaller, touching moments of intimacy (both sexual and otherwise) in an episode largely talked about for its ending action sequence.
Tim Surette, TVGuide – In which he correctly identifies redditors as overanalyzing every little mystery we still have le – Never mind. They’ve all been solved now. No more mysteries left. Thanks, Reddit!
Who wrote your favorite reviews this week?